A Comedy With Bats And Balls

Major League is a great baseball movie - I enjoy it every time I see it. Can the Orioles pull an "Indians" and go to the postseason with a bunch of unproven guys and over-the-hill veterans? You can compare the two teams, but I have a feeling that the real season isn't going to have the Hollywood ending.

Melvin Mora = Roger Dorn; "What do you want Melvin to do? Dive for it?"

Adam Jones = Pedro Cerrano. "Straightball, he hit it very much. Curveball...bats are afraid."

Daniel Cabrera = Rick Vaughn. "Wild Thing! You make my heart sing! You walk everything!"

Steve Trachsel = Eddie Harris. "He hasn't got an arm like you, kid."

Kevin Millar = Jake Taylor. "Bad back, bad knees. Inspirational leader. Here's to one more good year in the sun."

Peter Angelos = Rachel Phelps. "Continually in the way of his team performing well."

Dave Trembley = Lou Brown. "Trembley spent 20 years managing in the minor leagues; Lou Brown spent 30 years managing at Toledo and also sold tires on the side. There's two or three potential All-Stars on this team, Charlie."

Andy MacPhail = Charlie Donovan. "Despite the utter hopelessness of being the GM (or GM-type guy) of his team, he is enthusiastic and dearly wants to win."

"Gary Thorne and Jim Palmer are, unfortunately, not Harry Doyle and Monty the Colorman. Palmer never shuts up and Thorne has no sense of humor." The season would go by faster if the O's had Bob Uecker as the commentator.